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Blogs

Fatal Attraction Part 2: Illuminating the Shadow of our Past

The basic premise of this series is to posit that our greatest challenges, problems, reverses, difficulties, hurts, or pain, have the power to crush us (if we let them), or offer the greatest opportunity for personal and spiritual growth. Specifically here, I am speaking of our childhood, and how huge a shadow it casts on our life—which could be good or bad, or likely, a mixture. Our parents are instruments of our karma and are meant teach us valuable lessons for living our lives. Many people don’t really worry about this and simply live without a lot of deep introspection about how their past has shaped them, which isn’t a bad fact if one is happy and fulfilled.

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(Fast forward sixteen years from the marriage spoken about in part 1.) This seemed like any typical San Francisco summer morning, foggy and cool, but it was anything but normal to Chris, who was going to do something he didn’t want to do, while his Dad, Johnny, was happy. They were driving to the courthouse for a divorce settlement. Parking, they walked up the stairs and into the building. John found the appropriate courtroom and they took their seats to wait their turn. Chris felt sick to his stomach and wished he could just run away, but knew he couldn’t, so instead, he retreated deeper into himself. It was like he wasn’t even there. Disassociation was how he survived childhood and it had served him well. While a good temporary protection strategy, it was a poor way to live at all times. Later in life, Chris would find his biggest challenge was learning to be present, and to feel, whether sadness or love, but depression became a way to be numb, though it gradually became his clue that something was wrong, very wrong.

For all practical purposes, the memory of this courtroom experience was gone, buried under the debris of pain and disappointment. He only knew it happened on the rare occasions his dad recounted how proud he was hearing that Chris, when asked by the judge, wanted to live with his father—which was totally untrue. Even though Chris couldn’t remember the last time his dad beat him, he still was afraid of him and on guard in case his father would become angry and hit him, so he didn’t speak his mind at court, or for that matter, much at all.

Fatal Attraction--Part 1

(this blog is recorded on the full page: quick time player is needed; works best with Firefox or Explorer; if you are using Google Chrome it will automatically play, so to not listen, mute your speakers.)
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Pattrica Ann Bailey stared mindlessly at the passing scenery as she sat in the moving train. She felt relaxed and glad to be away from Chicago and what seemed like a fixed future. In fact, the more miles away from the “Windy City,” the better she felt. While a fiercely independent and critically intelligent young woman, she couldn’t stand up to her mother Peg—still, after all these years! Patt (with two t’s please) had joined the Navy during the Second World War to escape her mom’s watchful eye, and even married, but then, after only a year she had to get a divorce. Her—now X—husband shocked her by revealing that he liked men better than girls and had no feelings for her. Thus, she was forced to return home in shame.

Although she had a very high IQ, Patt could be impulsive and over emotional at times. Thus her mom had never quite trusted her decisions, and was worried about her future. To “help” her daughter make a better choice in picking men, she invited a good looking, wealthy, navy captain over for dinner. He was nice enough Patt had thought at first and so they began dating. Before she knew it she was engaged, which she had agreed to do at the insistence of her mom. And the major problem was not only that she didn’t love him, but as she shared years later, “He was boooor-iiiiiing,” and Patt had a weakness for exciting men and doing fun things her mother didn’t approve of.

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Father of the Fallen–Experimental space hip-hop video about Śrīla Prabhupāda


Prabhupāda–Father of the Fallen

Surrendering to your love

by your mercy I find a treasure of pastimes

Let’s be Against Something! Yeah!

(this blog is recorded on the full page: quick time player is needed; works best with Firefox or Explorer; if you are using Google Chrome it will automatically play, so to not listen, mute your speakers.)
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You might consider this blog as a mirror, or opposite, of my last one on amazing things. I have often noticed how it is easier for people to be against something, than for something, and was reminded of this topic by a few comments on some Facebook posts. One person was upset with my “amazing topics” blog that I didn’t include something he was attached to, and then someone complained about my Bhagavad Gita quote, since it is a translation by Prabhupada with certain editing they don’t approve of. While I understand their complaints, I post on my Facebook page and share my Krishna.com blogs to (hopefully) inspire devotees and as my service to them—certainly not to upset them, though hopefully to get them to think—which is, of course, hard work, while reacting is easy, and is the just the opposite. Anyway, along with being a tad annoyed, I had to laugh at human nature (always a good idea), and was grateful for a blog topic that I think is quite interesting.

If you want to get a big group together in “agreement,” find something to be against, some pending problem or disaster, or the shortcomings of a public leader, and you will likely be successful. This is why negative political ads work. Even though the general population says they don’t like them, they still listen. Another way to "unite" people is to discuss, or complain about, the news! Bad news and scandals' sell and make headlines, while good news or stories of a Good Samaritan are often hidden inside the paper or website. If they do make the front page, they are only one out of twenty stories.

News is business, and a news business means readers or viewers are require to make money. Thus they want to give people news that gets their attention through being sensational, or shocking, which in reality doesn’t often reflect the sum total of what is really going on. And the result of constantly hearing bad news is that people become more afraid, cynical, and negative about life.

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